Feed her, fuck her, or put her out of her misery.
-Lakshri, it's so nice to be loved

I'll get you next time, St. Nick...
    -Alizdog

You killed Jemma! I demand you apologize!
    -John

74 Listen is a little much. You'd be hearing God say "Fuck!" every time another Republican was born.
    -Nick

Helen: Your mom on a Hobbit.
John: You want me to respond to that?
Helen: Yeah!
John: Okay, yes, since she dropped those fifty pounds she humps like a beast.
Nick: ...Write that down!

You get attacked by MindFlayers! 82 of them!
    -Shelly

It's a Ninja blade of grass.
    -John

Nick: That's a dead moose.
Helen: It got reincarnated as a dead moose?
John: We may be the first people on earth to use moose as a verb.

Jemma: That person was a three-year-old child.
Alizdog: What does he know?!
Shelly: I've got a balloon?
Alizdog: Guys! He's got a balloon!!!

I'm not a Hobbit! I'm just short!
    -Helen

The God of Haberdashery. Haberdasheria - that's what the orcs call him!
    -John

Why does Talic look like a hanger?
    -Jemma

That's a sick idea and I'm very impressed.
    -Nick

Nick: Have you ever tried to control a dragon?
Jemma: Left! No don't bite me, left!

Nick: Roll another D20.
Helen: Thank you, thank you!
Nick: No, that's not a thank you, that's roll another D20.
Helen: Oh fuck.

Hang on, guys! Remember, we can all be Resurrected, Nick said so!
    -Shelly

The dragon's 16, he's just hit puberty and he's discovered that Nirvana is the greatest band in the world.
    -Nick

Jemma: VAPA, basically. We're facing VAPA with teeth.
Helen: VAPA with acid breath!

Wait a moment. Did a drow just shout out, The drow are trying to hurt you? 'Eat me, eat me!'
    -John

Jemma: Talic can't scare away 500 drow. (rolls the dice)
Nick: No, but he can scare away 200.

I know it hurts. But look at it this way. There's popcorn.
    -Alizdog

Bianca: You know Draconic?
Deacon: Yes, I'm a wizard.

Helen: Hobbits rock!
John: I thought you weren't a hobbit.
Helen: All right..

A midgit orc, trying to defend a blind dragon. It's like an Escher painting.
    -John

Can the dragon be reincarnated as a dead moose?
    -Helen

There's no sneak attack here.   It's a head on collision.
     -Shaun

You're very impressed by this man an his anvil.
     -Shaun

You have a short sword, chain shirit, and no pants.
     -Shaun